It’s been a wild ride the last couple weeks. Around here, when it rains, it pours. Sometimes literally. From the kitchen ceiling flooding like something out of a movie, to both grandfathers ending up in the hospital, to general stress, it has been challenging. When you live with anxiety and stuff like that happens, you know that while you may appear to be doing okay in the moment, it’s only a matter of time before you fall apart completely. Wednesday night/Thursday morning was that time for me. Heading to bed, cue anxiety attack. Thursday morning, woke up, swapped cars with my dad, doing ok. Get back home…and I felt like I was going to burst into tears.
Don’t know why, I just did. Tried breathing deep, looking at happy videos, the usual stuff that usually helps. Nothing really did. Okay, I talked to my mom about it and getting it out there made it help a little. I started taking Rescue Remedy pastilles (Seriously, if you’ve never used Rescue Remedy, you need to. It’s a life saver for anxiety) and got ready to ride. For a solid moment I thought about cancelling last minute, but I always feel like a jerk if I have to do that. So I didn’t. I braved the highway and drove to the barn.
Turns out, that was the best thing I could have done. There have been times before when I really don’t feel like going riding (because of whatever crap is going on in my life at the moment), but when I do, I feel so much better.
Part of it is the interaction with the horse. It’s fuzz therapy. Something to snuggle and pet. It really helps to calm you down and steady you. Then once you’re on the horse, you need your brain to be fully on the riding. You just don’t have time to be thinking about last minute work shifts or doctors appointments or sick grandparents. For that time, all that matters is you and the horse. It is such a freeing feeling. You don’t even realize until after you’ve dismounted that you haven’t been thinking about all the crap. I headed off to the rest of my day feeling refreshed and calm.
Plus, my riding costs about a quarter of what my counselor appointments used to cost, so it really is cheaper than therapy!